Health

I love the money and the glory of the position brings to me.

BUT i value my health more. My physical and mental and emotional health.

I have never been so banyak songeh or so kuat mengadu like i am this year. Extreme bullshit environment brings the best and the worst out of me. Mungkin itu hikmah.

I keep thinking: baru februari der. Takkan nak mental breakdown lagi mcm bulan november hari tu?

I am not strong. I may appear like i am one sebab i force myself to be one. Well, not gonna happen anymore. Sudah banyak shit aku tanggung bulan ni. Keep pep-talked myself: jangan nangis. You have done that too much last year.

Guess what. Aku tak nangis masa kerja. Tapi aku nangis dalam hati dan akibatnya susah nak tido malam. Jantung asik dupdapdupdap. Kalau mimpi kawen takpe la jugak ye tak?

I need to make a stand. I need to find that courage to say what i've been composing in my head over and over again to Le Boss. I must not let Le Boss decide what i want to do anymore like last december.

Berikan aku kekuatan itu ya Allah. Bismillahirrahmanirrahim